Yes guys, I am FAT...Obese...overweight...take your pick.
For years, I have been fighting this perennial issue with not consistently good long term results.
Has it impacted me? Hell, yes!
Has it hurt me...has it made me sour...has it made me look at things differently..has it changed me beyond what I would want to? Answer to all these questions is YES in varying degrees.
Now, before I go further I want to state categorically that this is NOT my sob story and this is also not a random fat guy whining at life!
I have had a habit of being called fat/jadyo/healthy (yes..HEALTHY is a 'nice' way of calling anyone fat in some Indian societies). When I was very small it didn't impact me much...I was a very jolly funny guy who enjoyed school, friends, sports (played football and represented district team in U13 team), music, participated and excelled in general knowledge/essay competitions etc.
As I grew up things started getting complicated - mainly because of me paying too much attention to what others said...what others saw and what others liked/disliked.
It was not always that I was aware or carried that baggage of being obese - for me having loved ones in my life who cared about me..for whom I could care for..was enough. That's all life was for me then and was extremely happy!
Where I lost my path...lost the will...lost my heart was when started listening to strangers or people who didn't matter over listening to my loved ones, my friends and most of all my SELF.
This is a situation I still struggle to shrug off and try to ignore what people say - not very successful but still trying.
What I have observed in these 40 years of my life is how people perceive and judge others just based on the appearance. They decide what a person with a particular appearance is like. They make fun of people who do not fit that definition...
While our parents/elders/teachers pass on values and teach us the difference BETWEEN good and bad/morality etc., why can't they teach WHAT is good and bad...how we should or should NOT treat others...how their physical appearance doesn't matter in their being a friend, colleague, stranger...human!
While we teach children not to make fun of anyone with a physical disability, why show mental disability by judging those who do not have a disability but are just different from you in perceived appearance?
I have been guilty of not taking good care of my health...but the people around have been bigger culprits in making me feel miserable, lose confidence in myself and just not loving myself.
Many may argue that I should have the will power to not fall to this trap, and it is right, but then personality is not something 1 is always in full control of. People for centuries have fought hard to just understand and realize SELF and to understand the human mind. It is not the same for all. Just like not all can be a college topper, not all can be strong willed superhumans.
So please...if you can't help someone, just let them live their life without judging. That would be your biggest service to humanity!
For years, I have been fighting this perennial issue with not consistently good long term results.
Has it impacted me? Hell, yes!
Has it hurt me...has it made me sour...has it made me look at things differently..has it changed me beyond what I would want to? Answer to all these questions is YES in varying degrees.
Now, before I go further I want to state categorically that this is NOT my sob story and this is also not a random fat guy whining at life!
I have had a habit of being called fat/jadyo/healthy (yes..HEALTHY is a 'nice' way of calling anyone fat in some Indian societies). When I was very small it didn't impact me much...I was a very jolly funny guy who enjoyed school, friends, sports (played football and represented district team in U13 team), music, participated and excelled in general knowledge/essay competitions etc.
As I grew up things started getting complicated - mainly because of me paying too much attention to what others said...what others saw and what others liked/disliked.
It was not always that I was aware or carried that baggage of being obese - for me having loved ones in my life who cared about me..for whom I could care for..was enough. That's all life was for me then and was extremely happy!
Where I lost my path...lost the will...lost my heart was when started listening to strangers or people who didn't matter over listening to my loved ones, my friends and most of all my SELF.
This is a situation I still struggle to shrug off and try to ignore what people say - not very successful but still trying.
What I have observed in these 40 years of my life is how people perceive and judge others just based on the appearance. They decide what a person with a particular appearance is like. They make fun of people who do not fit that definition...
While our parents/elders/teachers pass on values and teach us the difference BETWEEN good and bad/morality etc., why can't they teach WHAT is good and bad...how we should or should NOT treat others...how their physical appearance doesn't matter in their being a friend, colleague, stranger...human!
While we teach children not to make fun of anyone with a physical disability, why show mental disability by judging those who do not have a disability but are just different from you in perceived appearance?
I have been guilty of not taking good care of my health...but the people around have been bigger culprits in making me feel miserable, lose confidence in myself and just not loving myself.
Many may argue that I should have the will power to not fall to this trap, and it is right, but then personality is not something 1 is always in full control of. People for centuries have fought hard to just understand and realize SELF and to understand the human mind. It is not the same for all. Just like not all can be a college topper, not all can be strong willed superhumans.
So please...if you can't help someone, just let them live their life without judging. That would be your biggest service to humanity!
1 comment:
True! People need to be taught not to judge people on appearances. Lot of us, including me, still judge others based on various factors. Not good!
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